Guest Post: The Word You’re Looking For is “Underwhelmed.”

After a movie one afternoon, La Femme and I were feeling somewhat hungry, but far too lazy to go out of our way.  Hey, it was hot.  You understand.  Conveniently we could go right across the bridge from Rave into the cool and inviting Ranch House Kitchen.  There was even a smiling hostess giving us a sincerely friendly welcome.  Add to that 15% off for showing today’s movie stub and you have a recipe for awesome, right?

Right?

Well, not really.  I can really say about the experience is “meh…”  To be fair, the staff was really nice, and not just in that ‘I have to be nice, it’s my job’ kind of style.  No, they were downright personable, and looked like they enjoyed being there. The food wasn’t bad either, it just wasn’t good.  So what’s the problem?  Let me explain.

The RHK is set down in prime real estate known as Town Square, and Town Square is not cheap.  They charge a tenant a whole caboodle-load of cash for the privilege of opening up shop there, so of course the un-savings are passed right along to us.  While not the most expensive place in Town Square by a long shot, you still pay more for the meal than I really think its worth.  Case in point, Jalapeno Poppers: we paid eight bucks for six, tiny, cream cheese filled, half jalapenos.  The same ones you get at any bar in the USA that has a deep fryer in back. 

… Wheeee!

Then we got what appeared to be two of the more interesting dishes: Fried Green Tomato Sliders and a Reuben Pizza.  There were only two sliders, with dry buns and overcooked meat, containing pitiful fried tomatoes and what we assumed was a Tabasco mayo.  The pizza was on a crust reminiscent of Foccacia, which didn’t help the flavor at all, and they weren’t too picky about the corned beef, which came in over-sized chunks and a fair amount of gristle.  It wasn’t inedible; it just wasn’t anything I’d ever care to order again.

Long and short of it, if you are drunk and hungry and happen to find yourself there, it’s fine.  Again, the staff is nice and the setup is roomy and comfortable (albeit decorated in an urban cowboy motif that’s kind of unimaginative.)  But if you are looking for either something new and exciting, or just really well done, it’s not the place.  

 - TNB