Snark

 (original blog date January 23rd, 2008)
You know how you have that little obnoxious five year old living inside your head? The quick-witted one that come up with things so mean you can't believe it came out of your own head?

Well, my five-year old is on her game today.

I was in a newly renovated bathroom on the strip today, and I was sitting at the "vanity mirrors" deleting pictures from my phone. A few girls came up and stood at the mirrors behind me, so I could see them in my mirror.

They were wearing the typical tourist dressing like a hooker apparel; draped shirts over skin tight, low waisted jeans. They do not have bodies for these outfits, and there is skin pouring out of everywhere. They are talking in typical "to loud because drunk" fashion, so I can't help but overhear their conversation.

One of the girls says, out of nowhere, "God blessed me with beautiful eyes and beautiful lashes."

My five year old muttered under her breath; "And nothing else."